I’ve been eager to see cars in all kinds of miserable conditions in my time here on this car-filled planet we call Earth, but I think the highest ratio of crappiness to urge to see a particular car happened when I was in a little town called Esquel, in the Patagonia area of Argentina. I was on a Mini-sponsored trip that would eventually take me all the way to the southern tip of South America, but at the moment this picture was taken, I was simply thrilled to be in physical contact with a car I never expected to see in person: an IES 3CV America.

Well, I guess if I’m really honest, what I’m seeing in person there is like 70 to 85% of an IES America, but that’s good enough for me. I’ve always been fascinated by these cars for a number of reasons. First, because they’re basically Citroën 2CVs, a car that’s been one of my favorites since, well, forever. But what I find really fascinating about these is the bizarre and pleasingly half-assed way IES (which stands for, in case you were wondering, INDUSTRIAS Eduardo SAL-LARI S.A.) attemped to update the archaic 2CV design into the 1980s.

The 3CV America was introduced in 1986, and featured a number of pretty dramatic changes to the basic 2CV design. One big one was that instead of a trunk lid, a real, full-length hatchback was installed, making the car significantly more practical. You can see here on the one I saw how the hatch is now hinged above the rear window, where the rubber opening roof meets the metal of the hatch:

The only evidence on this one are some holes where the headlights and grille would have gone, but the whole front end was updated as well.

All the plastic bits are gone on the one I saw, but back in the day, this car’s face would have looked like this:

Look at that! Square headlights in plastic bezels, sort of integrated into the fenders! A black plastic grille, and a big black bumper with integrated indicators and sidelights! It’s so modern! And look at how modern the dash became:

Holy crap, all that textured black plastic and rubber, those tweedy seats, all those indicator lights – this feels like a car of the ’80s! I will admit, I’m not entirely sure what was different in the Super America versions; I do know the cars had electronic ignition on the old Citroën air-cooled boxer twin engine, and I suspect there were other subtle modernizations. Also there are Ferraris named “Super America” too, so try not to get confused.

Here’s a nice one seen on video, so you can get the full sense of how much they tried to update these:

There’s something about the slapped-on nature of the ’80s-looking elements on this incredible iconic and archaic basic design that really appeals to me, in a deeply confusing way. I can’t say it’s exactly successful, but I can say I love it, so I think that’s good enough.

I’m so taken by these, I was genuinely thrilled to find that one, even in its incredibly rough and unfinished state. I’d like to think it’s been restored now, and is happily bopping around Argentina, running over ex-Nazis and eating nice thick steaks.